Write Your Own Panto - Royalty Free Scripts

PUSS IN BOOTS

A traditional full-length pantomime that includes all the usual characters – Tom and his Cat, the princess, the ogre, the cat catcher, Old King Cole and his queen and the gypsy king. Lots of pantomime comedy, music, slapstick, magic and music for all the family. Running time two hours plus interval.

CAST

TOM	:	Principal character, the owner of Puss.
PUSS	:	Principal Character. Lots of dancing, talking & 1 solo song
DAME	:	Matron in the orphanage. Main comedy part.
PRINCESS KATE	:	Principal girl character.
GYPSY ROSE	:	Minor principal part, daughter of the king of the gypsies.
DEPUTY MATRON	:	Assistant to Dame – minor comedy role
MRS BEADLE	:	Minor baddy. Runs the Orphanage.
TEACHER	:	Teaches in the orphanage. One major scene.
OLD QUEEN COLE	:	Mother of Princess . Important minor part, some singing
GYPSY KING	:	Boss of the gypsies, some lines, group singer
OLD KING COLE	:	King, who is hard of hearing
BEADLE	:	Head of the orphanage, Miser and skinflint
PING and PONG	:	Comic duo rogues. Work for the king but also the Ogre.
CAT CATCHER	:	Principal baddy. Tries to catch puss.
HERALD	:	Announces the King.
CHAMBERLAIN	:	Works for the king.
YOKELS	:	Comedy duo farmers
OGRE		The real baddie. Some singing and recitiation.
LION		One-scene part. The animal that the Ogre changes into.

Sample Scene - In the Palace.

(A very deaf King Cole is sat on his throne, looking worried. Queen B is helping Princess to try on dresses)

QUEEN B: (to King) What do you think of this for the Summer Ball, dear.

KING C: (cupping hand to ear) What’s that dear? Speak up!

QUEEN B: We are going to dance

KING C: Going to France! Not me! They have the guillotine there for royalty.

QUEEN B: Never mind, dear. Do you like your daughter’s dress?

KING C: Yes, it’s very nice, but what happened to the one she wore last year.

QUEEN B: You can’t expect her to wear that old thing again. (She hands two dresses to the Princess). We’ll have this one and that one and the one we looked at yesterday

KING C: Errrr, how much is that? We’ve got to economise. This morning the bank sent back one of our cheques

QUEEN B: Oh good! Now we can use it again!

KING C: You don’t understand - there is no money in our bank.

QUEEN B: Well send it to another bank. They can’t all be out of money!

KING C: There is no money in the royal coffers. We are nearly bankrupt. You know we have to send the weekly ransom to the Ogre or else he eats the children and we have no money left.

QUEEN B: Well, if we could find a suitable young man to marry our beautiful daughter – that would be one less mouth to feed.

KING C: Mmm,Yes, that would solve two problems at once. IF we could find a prince with lots of money.

PRINCESS: And who was handsome!

KING C: Is that absolutely necessary? Handsome young rich princes are not easily found.

PRINCESS: We could advertise on the internet.

KING C: No dear, it’s not been invented yet.

PRINCESS: Well that’s a pity, somebody should invent it!

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John Yates has worked in amateur pantomime for over thirty years as an actor, writer and producer. He has written pantomimes for most of the popular traditional pantomimes and currently runs a Community Drama Group in Cheshire. He has collected thousands of gags, skits, sketches, and comedy routines and has now put these together in a convenient reference book. He also writes scripts for puppet plays and local concert parties.

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